Home » Elizabeth Lavine


Elizabeth Lavine

San Jose, California, US

As a child, I experienced a deep connection with nature. It was a solace for the pain of feeling unloved, unwanted, worthless, ugly and ever-afraid of what “terrible thing” might happen around every corner.

I sought relief and safety in food, sugar, people-pleasing, sports and reading. As a young adult, I developed a passion for spiritual books and practices. My first living teacher was a Taoist Master. I came to understand there is a true Self, a Self which cannot be traumatized, threatened and cannot die; and that one could realize it in this lifetime, not after life in “heaven.”

For many years I studied how to find and realize the divine Self within. I understood that the way was meditation–to learn to give one’s attention to the great inner silence instead of focusing on personal thoughts and emotions—the me-story in the head. But I could not (or would not) make the commitment to sustained meditation.

After I discovered Eckhart Tolle’s teachings in 2000, I experienced a turning point. Why was my conscious attention so stuck on the “me-story”? Because of unfinished emotional business, which Tolle calls the pain-body. These contractions, tensions and held-onto energies in the emotional field acted as a constant inner alarm, which the mind was continually trying to figure out and solve.

However, through persistently addressing the pain-body, (stressful thoughts mixed up with bodily agitation), and allowing it to dissolve, choosing presence became easier and easier. In my case, it took many years to be willing and able to make that choice consistently.

I had a lot of help! I attended Byron Katie’s School for The Work in 2003. I learned how to identify and challenge thoughts which demanded my attention; I uncovered belief systems which had kept my consciousness mixed up with the wants, needs, rights, and shoulds–all belonging to the idea of an individual person. I discovered the Sedona Method, which was a great help in learning how to release emotions. My life changed radically, and happily in many ways, including the end of a life-long addiction to food / sugar.

I got even more help when I found The Living Inquiries in 2011. The starting point in TLI is the unfinished emotional business, combined with a rigorous self-inquiry. Being able to ask “Who feels this?” and “Who thinks / believes this idea?” cuts through identification with thoughts and emotional energies most effectively. A quiet mind and being present as The Way of life, is now a joyful opportunity!

It is my honor and privilege to serve you, if your desire is to make Presence a priority in your life. I look forward to guiding you with inquiry.

I’ve been facilitating The Work of Byron Katie since 2003 and The Living Inquiries since 2013.

I am a parent to three amazing adult children and seven grandchildren. My past experience includes:

  • The Work of Byron Katie (Institute for The Work Trainer)
    • The Sedona Method
    (Certified Coach; Assistant Director Certified Coach Program)
    • Certified Practitioner, The BodyTalk System
    • Pain-Body Release Coach
    • Published Author
    • Macrobiotic Chef and Instructor
    • Ayurvedic Chef

Thank you for visiting!

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“I am really so grateful for your bringing forth this inquiry into emotions through the Work, and now through the Kiloby method. For the majority of my life I was so afraid of feeling my emotions and yet I craved feeling my emotions. Now I am seeing them as a gift and something else to be grateful for”.

“Elizabeth is an “emotion whisperer.” I can only give an inkling into how much I have gained in five years of working with her. I call her about five times a year, when things get really tough. I know I can dig myself out of most problems, but every once in a while I need some new support. I turn to Elizabeth to be walked through my emotions and my thoughts about them. She gently but firmly helps me see how I set myself up to suffer. She provides ways to unsuffer through attention and inquiry. Every time I call there is another way of phrasing, another angle, consistent with her perspective. I have read the writers and healers who have been sources for her thinking, but I go to Elizabeth for the accent she puts on them within a space she holds. It is such a luxury to be able to relax into the suffering while she holds me and my mind to account. This accountability restores me to right mind and it gets a little easier to do it on my own each time”.

“After a few sessions with you in the Compulsion Inquiry, I am relieved to notice there is a systemic shift. After all the years of trying other methods and approaches to overcome food compulsion, I feel this is what I’ve been looking for. Spotting the ghost image or ghost feeling, and taking the time to acknowledge it, breathe with it, feel it. All along, that ghost image has just been asking to be acknowledged. It takes time, but we worked on that in the last session—the compulsion to not want to stop and take time. All this time, there was that persistent ghost “Itch” saying “Go ahead, eat.” Now I notice it’s just an itch, wanting to be acknowledged”.